Turning 40: Dependent on God, Not Defined by Age

By Sandra Jean Charite

Since the beginning of this year, I’ve been dreading to turn 40. I know that turning 40 is a milestone. I am grateful that, by the hands of God, I made it this far, but I am burdened with a reoccurring question in my head: “What have I done in these 40 years on earth?”

Yet the answer to that question is bigger than what my eyes can see. All I keep hearing God say is that there is more, and my age doesn’t define my purpose and His plans.

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“I kept waiting for easy, but easy just never came the way I expected.”

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I guess most of my anxiousness comes from the fact that I don’t believe I am where I should be. I’m blinded by the failures, disappointments, and heartbreaks that I’ve encountered in my life. I keep having to stop, recover and then go on to the next impediment. Although I have played a part in these setbacks (I take accountability), I just didn’t expect to be overburdened by them. I’ve run harder and closer to God in these last 10 years than ever before in my life, because adulting hit me like a ton of bricks. I kept waiting for easy, but easy just never came the way I expected.

Dreams Versus Reality

I had a vision of what the age of 40 looked like, which included my husband, being a mother, owning a house, and having a suitable career, but it seemed like I was far from that. The closer I got to my dreams, the more setbacks I encountered. By the way, these are not excuses, but I’m telling my truth. I must admit my mind has created stories to keep me in a paralyzed state, but I keep pressing on knowing that tomorrow will bring the change I’ve longed for.

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“Oftentimes, I felt like I’d made too many mistakes, taken the wrong path too many times, or just waited too long so it was too late, and God’s purpose expired.”

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Honestly, I don’t want to throw a pity party, and I want you to know that God’s timing supersedes everything. Ecclesiastes 3:1 says, “For everything there is a season and a time for every matter under heaven” (NRSVUE). The Bible also states in Isaiah 60:22, “At the right time, I, the Lord, will make it happen” (NLT). Oftentimes, I felt like I’d made too many mistakes, taken the wrong path too many times, or just waited too long so it was too late, and God’s purpose expired.

Throughout the Bible, God constantly reminds us that He’s in control of our lives. Before I took my first breath, God knew me and formed me in my mother’s womb (Psalm 139:13). God also had a plan for my life, which is a good plan and will come to fruition.

God knows and loves you beyond your comprehension. He sees the amazing person He created. He sees all the potential that He created in me.

Despite my failures, disappointments, and mistakes, God sees more that He wants to use in this vessel. Sometimes, honestly, it’s hard to see that because of my mishaps. Sometimes it wasn’t the enemy attacking me, but it was me and my poor planning and bad decision-making.

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“When you mess up, the safest place to run is in the hands of God.”

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In the Hands of God

This month’s Light + Life articles are focused on the value of showing up dependent on God, who is not intimidated by your failures and mistakes. He wants to be with you and walk alongside you when you’ve messed up. When you mess up, the safest place to run is in the hands of God.

While society may believe that you are only purposeful when you’ve become a mother, birthed a child, or been successful in your career, God looks down and says I still have a purpose. Turning 40 does not define God’s plan for my life. He is the author of time. The Bible says, “He has made everything beautiful in its time” (Ecclesiastes 3:11). We serve a God who knows how to redeem time! God can “restore to you the years that the swarming locust has eaten” (Joel 2:25 NKJV).

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